Tuesday, March 6, 2012

The Unloading of Truth

Hey you guys, I'm super busy with work...so of course I had to take the time to fill you in on all the things.

Thing 1, The House: And behold, the light did shine upon the shorn hillock and the house did sparkle in its gentle caress. WHAT? We're getting the house (obviously, I mean, how direct could I be?). After two botched appraisals, switching lenders, and days filled with frantically playing telephone with realtors, a final agreement has been reached. We sign papers in two days. Huzzah!

Thing 2, the possible baby: Is not possible. Let me take a step back to fill in the hazy what-ifs I've been filling the Internet with lately. The very month that we started trying (wink wink nudge nudge, etc.) I stopped having  my monthly visitor. The next month, her red wings again failed to grace my nethers. And yet - pregnancy test after pregnancy test said nay. Finally, after almost 2 1/2 months of WTF, and eating super healthy, and having all sorts of pregnancy symptoms (I have outgrown my bras and the entire chestular region is completely off limits because OW! Also, headaches. And fatigue. And WTF where is my damn baby??!), my OB made time to see me.

The prognosis: my hormones decided to be all wild and wacky. Possibly because I gained almost 7 lbs! Some of you might be rolling your eyes at this, but I am only 5 feet tall, and I have never had a sudden weight gain before. The OB said some people's hormones are very sensitive to weight changes. SO, no baby and I get to take progesterone pills to force my period. Which means (drum roll please) I get even more of the uncomfortable pregnancy symptoms with no baby! Reverse huzzah! As in, fuck you body.

The real kicker: the timing of all this. R and I had wanted to try to make a baby in Jan and Feb so we'd have a fall baby. This would time out great with my work schedule and we'd avoid me going through the 3rd trimester during flu season. You see, mothers who contract influenza in their 3rd trimester have children with a higher predisposition for certain mental illnesses. Layer in the fact that there is mental illness in my family, and you can see why I don't want to stack the odds in that direction. But, thanks to wild and wacky hormone sabotage, we didn't even get to try in Jan or Feb.

The bright side: I will be able to help paint/remove carpet/lay laminate in the new house. We plan on getting a lot of things done in the new house in the next two weeks before we move in and if I was pregnant I would have only been able to play a minor role.

The cloudy side: I am hormonal due to, well, hormones that are being pumped into my body. I am not an emotional person and I HATE even the tiniest out of control moods. Now I'm getting chokey just looking at my friends' babies on Facebook because it's not fair that I didn't get 100% what I wanted when I wanted it, wahhhh, 1st world problems.

Also, trying to decide if we really want to wait 3 months before we start trying again. We have a while to think on that thanks to hormones.

Also, also, I did get to drink alcohol for the first time in a couple months. I threw up afterwards. No regrets.